Will It Ever Rain Again?…

Dragging The Lake For Things I Already Know

Taking it out on me, I get it
Shut your mouth, where do I begin?
Carving out a likeness in stone
A distance within reach
I see you, but did you ever see me?
Selfish, what isn’t about me
Selfless, tearing flesh from bone
A theme as of late, collecting all the things
Take inventory of every scorn
Each slight against one another
The silence speaks more than the screaming
Thought you were my brother, couldn’t be more wrong
As much as I am right
I hear what you are saying
But fuck you anyway
If you couldn’t fucking tell
I am hurting
Maybe one day you could forgive
Whatever it is that I did
Without knowing, until then let the war
Let all this shit continue
I’ll be waiting as I always have

Expecting me to say sorry
You should know already
God forgives not me
Hate me if you must
But know I’ll be waiting
Anger will fade
Maybe the pain stays the same
Not always right, never willing to admit the truth
I’m only human
Said all I am willing to say

 

Tear You Apart

Drag your soul through hell
What part of I will
Love you forever
Do you not understand
Sinking nails into your brain
Filling your thoughts with so much pain
The words don’t always mean the same
Forgettable and lame
My love will always be the same
An endless devotion to killing you
How can you not understand
What I mean when I say
I love you

 

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These were… are personal… one is about a friend… another about… well love and what it really means… our partners are something special… I’m stealing this next thought from somewhere… but we just download all this shit onto others… fuck it… I don’t want it… you can have it… right… wrong… how it is… there is only so much shit that we can stand… harbor… endure… relationships are more important than we know… correction… healthy relationships are more important than we know… 

Sometimes we take advantage of situations that we are in… the people we really love… it is easy to do… are we monsters?… or we human?… it really depends… in most cases we are human… we are being selfish… being ourselves… that’s when it is time to take a step back… realize we can’t always be right… and we can’t always be wrong… it takes a stronger person to admit they are wrong… than the asshole screaming we are right… but when you are right you are right… confusing I know… life is inherently confusing… life at times can seem like shit… 

If you don’t know by now… We take advantage of the people we love the most… because it is easy… because they are already there… every one loves the chase… loves the feeling of getting to know someone new… but being the one… the one who is always there… it isn’t fun… it is essential… there is a balance to all of this shit called life… no one can tell you how to be… when to step back… when to not be selfish… no one can tell you what to do… but if you want to suffer… that’s your fucking problem… that’s a shit thing to say… but life is shit… step back and look at everything… if all fails… fight the war… but know that war… anger… hate… should always be the very last thing anyone should do… there is no shame in coinciding… there is no shame and being like yeah I was fucking wrong… you are not the center of the universe at all times… 

No one ever said being human was fucking easy… if they did… they lied through their fucking teeth… you know what is right and what is wrong… God or no God… you know… I think it is time… time we trying being the best person we can be… no violence… no hate… find yourself frustrated… take a step back rather than a step forward… understand we are all in pain… we are all suffering… and you know what… we are all in this together… today might be the greatest day of your life… but for someone else it might be the worst day they could ever live… respect the balance… be a descent person not because it is right… but because that the way you would want to be treated… be selfish by being selfless… see how it feels… if I’m wrong… I’m fucking wrong… at least you tried… I respect that… 

 

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3 thoughts on “Will It Ever Rain Again?…”

  1. L.
    I get you.

    Your after thoughts spoke much louder than your beautiful poems.

    Everything is about balance. But I’ve realised lately that it’s not just 2 things in a balance. If that makes sense. It’s balance within balance within balance within balance. There are so many layers involved in finding your truth. We fight with it daily and sometimes come out victorious, often we lose but we are only really fighting ourselves. A tip to one side more than the other is where we can sometimes find joy or love or lust or rage or excitement or any other million emotions and that thrill us, no matter what it is. They key is always trying to regain the balance before we are tipped to one side again to experience the thrill of just but not quite falling off the edge.

    Hugging you

    Liked by 1 person

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