Something Different

Together Until the End

The thoughts like suicide loses meaning
If done more than twice
Never look back, Keep plowing ahead
None of this will matter when we are all dead
Nuclear holocaust, burning until there is no resolve
Whoever said the cold war had ended is dead now
I’m telling you to have something to say
Not that anyone would listen anyway
Who am I, amongst the masses
Who am I, amongst the depressed fascists
There can be no voice of a generation
If everyone is shouting at the same time
How is it that the dumbest rise above us
How is it that we could be so blind
Falling for the same tricks time after time
Maybe in the end, there is no intelligent life after all
Maybe we deserve each other, deserve the graves we’ve dug
At least in this, we will finally be one
Rotting and bleeding, once and for all

Unleashed Thoughts

Sweating bullets made of glass
Shattering on the ground
Pick up the pennies that have become
Worth barely more than worthless
Time is money, couldn’t trade time for money
Getting paid seems like an afterthought
To living at all
Breaking down the seconds into monetary value
Turning all the lies into regret
What has this become over time
A suspicion, a waste of energy
Give anything to take it back
But not what it takes to push ahead
Self-doubt is all there ever was
Broken mind and lost ideas of nothing
Spinning tales just to get by
Begging for more than there is to offer
Living in the present to only drown in the past

 

Through Glass (Vulgar)

“The devil made me do it. Tell them that. Tell them anything I don’t give a fuck,” I put my cigarette out on the table. “You didn’t even finish that one,” my lawyer says as he wipes the ashes and the butt into his briefcase. I light up another one out of spite more than need. It is the first hit that we all crave not the last. “We need to come up with a better strategy than the devil,” He starts up. “Like what? That I took a pistol to each one of their heads and pulled the trigger willingly?” I take a second drag off the cigarette. “Will you please keep your voice down?” He asks me because he knows he has to ask. No one tells me to do shit. Not the cops I killed, not the dealers I create, not even that bitch of a wife back home, no one and I mean no one tells me what to do. “Did you get me that drink or what?”

He hands me a flask out of his briefcase. Sucking down a big gulp of whiskey as he shakes his head. “Really? Nice, look I’m not telling you what you should say or how to run your business, but killing cops? In cold blood no less. That is strictly insane. How am I supposed to get you out of here with these charges?” He wipes another cigarette into his briefcase and I take another drink. “Shouldn’t have been trying to extort me. In my own home no less. What can I say I got a little upset?” “You could have said no or instead of tying them up and executing them you could have dropped them off somewhere. Honestly, anything but what you did might be better than this. The cops.” “The cops can go suck a dick. Do you have any idea how much I pay them to not interfere with my business? A fucking lot and then these rebel ass fuckers come to my house, in front of my family, and ask for more? They got what they deserve and you will get me out of here like you always do because I pay you a fucking lot of money too. So get off your ass, march through those doors, and do what it is that I pay you to do.” He stands up and runs his hands through his greasy hair, “I’ve been up all night trying to do just that. News flash you and all the money in the world are not going to get yourself out of this. I quit.”

“You can’t quit. You know damn well that once you walk through those doors you are a dead man. Your wife and kids are dead too. I’ll make sure that when my boys are through with them it will make what I did look like a mercy killing.” “Empty threats Marco because your boys already hired me to help run their new criminal empire.” I can feel the blood rush from my face, “Who the fuck do you think you are?” My heart skips a beat as my blood pressure rises.  I didn’t even hear them come in as the knife goes through the back of my neck. I don’t die. Not right away. No, I get to feel my face slam into the table. I get to feel my blood drain out of my neck. I get to feel, hear, see and live through all of it. Because in my world I get everything that I deserve.