People With No Name

“Is there anything I can help you find?” The customer looks over from the entry way of the store at the short stubby clerk standing behind the counter. The customer only came in for one item and has no idea where in this store it could possibly be.
“Yes you can I’m looking for. Oh it’s right there. Right in front of me the whole time.” The customer smiles as she reaches for the simple item on the shelf in front of her.
“Glad we could be of some help,” the clerk smiles. The customer gives off a short laugh as she carries the item to the counter.

“Me too. Does that happen a lot?”
“What do you mean?” The clerk asks the customer.
“Someone asks you where something is and they find it right in front of them?”
“Yes it happens a lot. They say it’s my gift.”
“That’s funny. Who says that?” the customer asks.
“The people with no name.”
“Who?,” the customer asks puzzled.
“The people with no name,” the clerk says calmly.
“Is that other customers?”

“No, I’m sorry I’ve said too much. I didn’t realize you didn’t know, never mind.”
“Know what?” the customer asks taken back.
“I’ve said too much. Are you ready to check out?”
“Where are these people you speak of?”
“If you must know they’re all around us. Can’t you at least feel them?”

The customer shakes her head and starts to become even more confused.
“They control everything and everything controls them. How do you not know about the people with no name?”
“Is there a manager or someone I can talk to?” the customer asks politely.
“Of course there is but why would you need to speak to them?”
“Because I do. In private if that’s okay?”
“Of course, of course just a moment please.” The clerk turns his head and begins to whisper as if someone is there, but there is no one the customer can see.

“The manager will be here in a moment.”
“But you didn’t even page or call anyone.”
“Yes I did,” the clerk says sternly.
“No you didn’t. Can you please page the manager for me?”
“Ma’am I already did and she will be here in just a moment.”
“What the hell is going on here?”

“How may I help you today?” A female voice asks.
The customer turns around to face the woman. “Are you the manager?”
“Yes I am, how may I help you?” She asks again.
“I need to talk to you in private,” the customer says as if to test the manager’s sanity.
“We have a non-believer,” the clerk informs the manager.
“Just because I don’t hear voices that make me a non-believer in something?,” the customer asks irate.
“You don’t hear them?” The manager asks politely.
“Hear what?” The customer demands.
“The people who have no name,” the manager says.
“There are no people here. Have you two lost your minds?”
“Ma’am there is no reason to be rude,” the clerk says.
The manager turns her head and begins to whisper and again no one is there.

“They say you are just not ready.”
“Not ready for what? Are you saying I’m not ready to hear voices in my head?”
“We don’t hear voices in our head ma’am. The voices are all around us. I tried to explain that the people are all around us, but I don’t think she understands.”
“How can she understand anything we are talking about if she does not believe?” The manager asks as if the customer isn’t even there.
“This is all just madness. I am calling someone I hope you know that and I’m never shopping here again.”

The customer throws her item up on the counter and storms out of the store. The manager calmly walks over to the counter and picks up the item, “Some people just aren’t ready yet.”
“I know it saddens me, but maybe one day.”
A hand reaches out from behind the clerk and rests on his shoulder.
“One day they will all believe,” the owner of the hand reveals.

About Time I Suppose

I always feel the need to do something more tangible. Something a little more personal. The thought washes over me like a wave. A tide that I’m slowly drowning in until well here we go. Recently I finally purchased my own little piece of where ever the hell I am now. You are all welcome to never come over so, knowing where that is, is irrelevant to the situation. Point is that I finally got some land. Not much one to two acres out way from most civilization. Enough to pretend that nothing else exists, but still close enough to get decent internet.

I even got all the things needed to take care of the land. Riding lawnmower, a weed eater, and whatever else. I got everything I tell everyone who might ask though no one ever does. The problem is though I don’t like to be outside. I like the idea of being outside, but never see the point of being out there. It’s like how I like the idea of walking around naked in my house, but I don’t because it’s not practical. What if someone comes over? We’ve spent hundreds of years perfecting inside. Why the fuck would I want to go outside? Needless to say the yard has become over grown and there is a fine layer of dust over all the things I needed to make sure that this didn’t happen.

Letting the yard go was a mistake. Not because there might be snakes or rodents or even monster out there. Who the fuck knows I don’t go outside. It was a mistake because apparently despite my best efforts I do have neighbors and they have a son. Nothing unusual, nothing too strange about having a child. I have one or whatever. The problem is that they saw my laziness as an opportunity for their son to take on a challenge. Never a great start because who the fuck what’s to do something their parents want them to do? I’d be a doctor by now if I had listen to my parents, but things work out how they work out. Or as my mother likes to remind me, “There’s still time.”  I’m half dead. There is barely time to do what I am already doing.

So I hired the kid because his parents were brave enough to knock on my door and speak to me for more than thirty seconds. Yes, that’s all it takes. Anything to get them away from my house. I would have given them the keys to the house if that would have been an option, but my family needs a place to stay. They are weak and too afraid of what is in the tall grass. “Sad,” a quote we can all use now. So the kid comes over once a week to cut my grass and watch me walk around naked in my house. It was awkward at first, but there might be things out there lurking in the grass.

Random As Random Can Be

Notes from History Class (This is the class I liked.)

Now I really don’t understand how this really works but I know that I need to be doing something since I am just sitting in class not saying anything or doing anything. I really don’t know why I continue to come to this class but I know I can’t miss another day because I have already hit my limit of miss days. I should be wasting my time typing up my next paper but instead I am talking to myself.

The big picture, we the people only voted for representatives

Basically says all governments all exist at the same time. Checks and balances. Everyone wants to rule the world. Tears for fears mother fucker. Oh yeah weak 80’s references.  Back to solitaire.

He believed that he was there for the good of the people.

This is going to be a long class filled with labor and death thou shall not consume water ever again. The nation was built on the idea of for the people by the people. All comes back to the declaration of independence. Most kings were there because of the divine right of kings.  Its thirteen little babies of death sucking at the tit of mother Russia. Kill kill, kill crew we strive to labor over the death of salvation but we bleed the history we choose to forget. Life can roll, roll right on down the hill, smashing the homes and our own people. Like a revolving wheel that has no purpose or no will.

A diamond ring made of your bone and flesh, pressed down hard beyond the limits of crushing. Hardened into a stone for my bony finger, your luxury is only pain for me, bleeding you, bleeding you dry, bleeding you, bleeding you dry.  Stock market crashes and so does your head, body out of window thrown into the wind, dropping, dropping to the ground, black market fall out, fall out, destruction in your mind, bleeding you, bleeding you, dry, bleeding you, bleeding you dry. I don’t want much just the soul you hold dear and love, I don’t want much just the soul you hold dear and love, there is no need to fear me, I’m the government you did not elect, there is no need to fear me, I’m the government put in place to protect, our own interest, our own interest, bleeding you, bleeding you dry, bleeding you, bleeding you dry. Bottom feeders, it is time to rise, rise, rise, and clam your own lives, rise, rise, bleeding you dry, rise, rise, bleeding you dry, rise, rise

A government that governs less governs best. A government left burning is the one still left turning, the increasing debt, rises at the cost of our own expense, what have you done? Now is your time to speak up, what have you done? Now is your time to speak up, what have you done? National health care is at an all time low, the money lining your pockets is at an all time high, people live in fear, of seeking care, people live in pain, to scared to receive care, what have you done? Now is your time to speak up, what have you done, now is the time to speak up, what have you done? The increasing debt, is being paid for by our blood, the increasing national debt, is being paid for by threat, forced to live in fear, forced to die in tears, what have you done? Now is the time to speak up, what have you done? Now is the time to speak up, what have you done?

Is the law that makes the bank constitutional Maryland or the law of genius falls hard onto the swords of death and frustration yet we bleed only to mop up the floor with our blood.  Southerners are going to follow Jefferson because he is from the south and the south follows anyone like sheep to a heard. Anything in the state of Maryland is going to bank in the state power of vaginal glory. All hail the wicked.

Where does the power lie when it comes to state power and federal power? He says it is in fact conditionals. There is a list in the constitution that gives congress the powers to pay for things. If marshal does not make that design we are back to the article of confederation type of government. Man is going crazy because the class will not speak up.  Will be the supreme law of the land, anytime federal laws conflicted with state laws, federal always wins. John Marshal strengths the federal government.

Each of the four men helped to define the federal government. A puppet government made up of Bert and Ernie dancing around sucking each other off like fascist at a dinner party. Why is the case important then?

We sold our souls for the great American dollar

“Wal-Mart doesn’t care about you”
the government doesn’t care about you
who does care about you?

We are a nation made of bastards and liars
from the time of our origin to now

If you made it this far. This is from my time in college about eight years ago… See health care has been a problem for a while… I’m not going to get all political… Well I might, but the thing that I like about America, among other things,  is this idea that we can say what we want… So I try not to judge when other people or I say stupid shit… We all do even after eight years and a filter… It happens.. Words are words.. It is by our actions that we should be judged… Of course this never happens… 

A Lie Preview

Days Keep on Going

Every day is exactly the same with only one slight variance. Wake up, take drugs, and go to either work or school. On really good days I just sit here and never move. This is what my life has become since she left me. My own personal prison. I can’t really say that I hate it all that much. We are all after some sort of prison when you stop to think about it. At least mine is my own.

Lately I haven’t had to go to college because of winter break, and to be honest I wasn’t really going that much before anyways so it’s all the same to me. School starts in a few weeks, I am almost certain, and I’m really not looking forward to it at all. I never wanted to go there in the first place, but my Mom told me if I wanted to continue to live in my house that I had to go to school. Really kind of a shitty situation but then again I live rent free. This frees up my money for the things that keep me going.

I know a man in town and he basically keeps me hooked to stay alive. It’s a rather sad existence, but hey I am still alive. I’m currently at work on one of my two fifteen minute breaks. I work in a drug store and some might say that’s not the best place for someone on drugs to work, but they were hiring and I need a job. When I started though I was a lot more stable. Working here isn’t really that bad, it’s just a bit mind numbing. It’s surprising the amount of stupid people in the world, but then again it’s probably not. I have a lot of time to reflect on such trivial thoughts such as intelligence. I work up front which is to say that I man the cash register. The company likes to pretend that I am nothing more than a cashier by giving me the title check out specialist. I don’t specialize in anything other than getting you the fuck out.

I could care less about your problems even though I smile and nod the whole time. All I am really thinking about is how much longer will your bullshit really affect me. I hate it when people talk to me about what they are buying as if I care at all. I really don’t care that you are buying laxatives, condoms, and a Mother’s Day card. All of this is trivial and pointless to me and my life.

It only gets better from here. Not a fan? Literally gets better from here because. Almost had me. I love to talk about my book. Questions? Ask them. Seriously comment away or get at me on twitter. It is sad and lonely in this cage. The chicken stopped talking once I ate him, and let’s be honest he didn’t have much to say before that either….

Broken Up Thoughts

They are trying to convince a generation built on speed, built on now to go slower on the streets. They might as well convince a dog to shit in the toilet. All of the skills are there but the instinct? Not so much. No one wants to go slower. If anything they want to go faster. Walk faster, talk faster, and be done faster. No one wants to do anything that takes time. This generation or the last. We are not designed to live in the now only the future. Even if that means a chance at death. Life itself is a chance at death.

 

He had so much anger growing up. I saw it right away. I knew I was going to have to do something so I told him, “You don’t hit anyone ever. You never hit a woman, a man, a child I don’t care who it is you never hit anyone” “But I want to dad,” he would say. “I know you do son but you don’t that’s life. You get in this ring though and you knock them the fuck out.” That’s what I would tell my son. That’s the strength I put in him. They say rich kids don’t fight and they’re wrong. Some people are born with this rage, this passion, this anger and money don’t have a fucking thing to do about it. If they don’t channel it. If they don’t get it out it consumes them. Destroys them and I wasn’t about to let that happen to my boy or anyone else.

 

Day in, day out, 9 to 5, 9 to whenever, however you want to put getting fucked. I am lost within myself. Lost in the dark. The theme is something I carry with me every second of every day. The lights all burned out. No longer even a flicker of a flame. Absolute dark. If only I could get beyond this. Step into the figurative illusion of this so-called light I’m missing in my life. Maybe then. Maybe somehow I could be who it is I always dreamed I could be. Then again maybe it will all one day come together for us all. I doubt it, but that could very well be who I am. In the end we all have something to say. In the end we all have our place in obscurity. We all have our own personal hell to wander through.

Faith For All That Is Left

Faith is a question we ask ourselves. An idea we question every thought and every action with. We do this based on faith that we are doing the right thing, that we are justified in our faith. But where does this faith come from? Does it come from religion or are we in fact born with this idea of faith. The question feeds itself over and over. The idea burns itself into our brains until it no longer matters which came first, but that we have faith at all. Over and over again we battle with ourselves and with each other. Over and over again. A constant battle of who is right and who is wrong. No one on earth is right and no one on earth is wrong, but in fact they are both.

Society states this and society states that, but who is this society? Where did this all start or where did all of this come from? A question as dense as the question of faith. The written word passes down information from generation to generation. Therefore passing the idea of society down with it. A giant game of telephone that eventually found its way to stone, to paper. Even words written in stone are really nothing more than an interpretation of an idea that began long ago. Nothing is permanent. Nothing can last.  Our words will change and evolve. Our world will change and evolve. Thoughts and ideas of today will not be the same a hundred years from now. Or will they? Will we or can we reach a point that the words we write, speak, or believe actually have a definitive meaning?

Unlikely giving the history of man or the will of man to manipulate words to their own will. It falls again on society. We have no real way of knowing where our society comes from. We can trace the pages of course, scour the library looking for such information, but in the end all this trail leads us to nothing more than theories. No one knows how this great society truly started. We can see the snowball effect of it all, but the very begin, the first spark? No one knows. Yet, somehow some way it is in there.

It is in our brains. Maybe even in our DNA. Quite possibly society and faith are etched into our very souls. Over lapping one another in the double helix that is us. Coming together to form the basis of our ideas or our way of life. However it may be or may not be in the end no amount of faith in society can provide a sustainable future. Corruption, greed, humanity will find a way to destroy everything. Proving once again that these two things have no answer, have no meaning. It is only a matter of time before everything falls apart. Nothing is forever. Nothing is permanent. Have faith in that.

And Other Things From This Time Preview

New America

Woke up with little to say
Now should be the time to strike
At a loss for how I feel
The words circle my mind without a thought
Miss guided, maybe
Lost as always
A constant need to say everything I am thinking
When will I ever shut up
My mind is always repeating
Coming up with more and more
Some of it worth saying, most of it the same shit as before
A bent helix and nothing more
Page turner is hard to come by
Wouldn’t understand unless you are already at my level
Zero sleep, pumping caffeine directly into my vein
Could OD and feel the same
An absolute with absolutely nothing at all
Foreign ideas lost in familiar land
Said we are the same but I have no idea who these people are
Learned to live so far away from here
They said it was the same and they couldn’t be more wrong
America failed itself over and over
Each generation a lost nation soaked in blood
A dirty mind lost in thought

Often

I often wonder what it feels to die
Does it feel like I do now
All alone with no one to talk too
I do this to myself
Yet I don’t know the answers to my own questions
I often wonder how soon
Will all this prove to be meaningless
They say you pave your own way
But what if it’s not true
What if this is nothing more than a collection
Of me and you
I often wonder about God
Am I him or is it you
All reason would lead to nothing at all
I feel like I know what I’m saying
But in the end it all seems to come out the same
Blood in blood out and all that shit
Maybe life is nothing more than a brotherhood
Of bull shit
I do this to myself
Get all upset for no good reason
I often wonder what it feels to die
And I know it has to feel like this

Now Available Where All Kindle Books Are Sold…. Yes I Sold Out Because It Is All That I Know….