Felt Right For The Time…

Looking Back Something I Miss…

For those of you who don’t know… now you do… DEVO…

Cannot get enough of this song… amazing video to go with it… perfect…

Haunting… Reznor… Lynch… Enough said…

That opening riff… is all anyone needs… but wait there’s more… #blessed…

So if you ever wondered… that is what I listen too when I write… just those four songs over and over again… haha… actually I listen to a lot of music… maybe I’ll bring this feature back… but for now… it felt right for the time…

Merch… Threadless… Books… Amazon… Broken Thoughts… Twitter

This Seems New? Because It Is…

Like Music?.. Like Poetry?…
Well Have We Got Something For You…
Raw Earth Ink Presents

The Poets Symphony

Right Now… And Five Minutes After… Okay Maybe Longer…

On My Desk Right Now

  1. Reciprocating Saw
  2. Mix of ash and saw dust
  3. Stacks of papers
  4. Ash Tray (Don’t smoke…)
  5. Lego building
  6. Pens and pencils
  7. Lemonade (The drink… not the person or Sprite)
  8. Speaker (Playing Feel Good Hit of the Summer by Queens of the Stone Age…)
  9. My head (Wondering… “what the fuck am I even doing?”..)

Answering a text. “Odd because so are we”… Context important only to me.

Looking over the papers. “What do I even want to do?… Write a story?… Broken Thoughts?… a poem or two?… Stare at the screen some more?… Puts head back on desk.

Daughter walks in the room. Screams at me about Ads on her knock off Minecraft game… “Fix it.” Too broke to buy the real thing… she is too young to even know how to use it… or so I think… deflects with… “I’m working”… Feeling like a shitty parent… the feeling will pass… Puts head back on desk.

Picks up lighter. (Seriously don’t smoke…) Lid catches on fire. (Too much fuel in the Zippo… Might be mentally challenged… stressing might…) Closes lid on lighter. Stares at the screen.

Thoughts in my head. I know that they are there… Big ass spider crawls across my desk. (Not Face Hugger Big… but big enough to notice…) “Do I kill it or let it live?”… try to kill it… it is too fast… lost it in the papers… no idea where it went… “Great”… Puts head back on the desk.

More texts. “Did you do what I asked?” No… feel like a shitty husband… the feeling will pass… Respond back. “I’m working”… Stares at the screen.

Instructions. Insert logo image. Insert links. Think of tags. Settle for what you already know. Schedule post. Put head back on the desk and think of something to say. Make something up if you have to.

Merch… Threadless… Books… Amazon… Broken Thoughts… Twitter

Sober writing is for people… who have something to say…

Let’s Keep This Party Going…

More music to shake your ass too… let’s get a little weird with this one… Same rules as last time… what comes up… comes up… : )

Queens of the Stone Age

This is about sex…. had no idea… because I’m Sick… Sick… Sick… Hack up a body and I’m like okay… talk about sex… and I’m like hold the phone… haha… yeah I’m very American… it sickens me… brings a tear… because I didn’t even grow up in America… That’s how deep these cuts lie… Crazy how much culture effects you each and every day… Oh… and I love this song…

Die Antwoord…

Speaking of… Zef all god damn day… So I don’t know if you know… but all this started and ends with music… That’s all I wanted to be… that’s what I failed at… writing is cool… I love it… but I settle for it… because the truth is… I want to be the greatest drummer of all time… that’s real… Music is my life… everything else is what it is… sadly I was born without any talent… I try… I dabble… I dream… but sadly Broken Thoughts is all I be… life if you ask me… but If I was who I wanted to be?… Fuck… I’d be the Zef American filling your head with sick ass beats… point is we all fail… embrace what is left… Broken Thoughts and all..

True Loves

This one… I find out who they were after I saw a Modest Mouse concert… (My favorite band…) to be honest I am not familiar with them at all… but I like this song… I saw some of the members open for Mouse…. It wasn’t bad… better than I could do… but not for me… I liked this though…

Machine Gun Kelly

Haha… I hated this song… but… in the end I became hooked for dumb ass reasons… MGK... isn’t my kind of shit… but I shit you not… he looks like my brother in law… He is homeless but he chose that for himself… so don’t feel bad… I don’t… asshole is living better than most people… but I still had to be like is that him?… haha… because that’s the dice life would roll for him… American all day… throw up in my mouth… still doesn’t explain everything going on over here… Capitalism details so many things that I don’t understand… basically I got hooked on this song… that’s it…

Die Antwoord….

Full circle… I ran out of songs… My daughter requested this song… that’s how much they have taken over my life… even my daughter knows what is up… This song is crazy… and long… My daughter is dancing to this song right now… between tapping out the beat… Life is crazy here… best line… pick one… this song has many… I may not have been the greatest drummer… but there is still hope for her… pushing music on to her… like I am to you… I am a dad after all… : )

Well… I had fun… hopefully you did too… music is life…

Music Time… Special Report…

I am listening to music… and you aren’t here with me… so we are going to go with whatever Spotify plays me and I don’t skip… let’s begin… (Warning this might get weird… Should be fun though…)… putting links in the captions… in case the video doesn’t load… I got you…

Not even going to comment… a fucking master piece… shit… : )… Pixies
Seether…. shh… Lemons… I can see the irony… : ) and no… that’s not why…

This song is long… fun fact… I don’t like long songs… who the fuck has the time?… I grew up punk… two minutes is pushing the limits for me… but now I am old… I make exceptions… mostly for Tool and Pink Floyd... but every one else?… let’s dial it down… boil it down to two minutes… if I’m really feeling it… I can always repeat… and I will… (Totally fucking around here… do what your heart tells you to do… maybe I listen… maybe I don’t… but who the fuck am I?..)

Misfits

Does this really need a comment?… I got into The Misfits… when downloading music was cool… maybe it still is… I don’t know… I’m not cool any more… Why bring this up?… well back then you downloaded any and everything from who ever you were into… as a circumstance… the name of the song could have been wrong… could have been whatever… but what I liked about The Misfits was that it didn’t matter… you could guess the title without trying… I played a game with my ex proving this point… because it really is that easy… May be why I love titles so much… and spend a lot of time on them… oh and the music is amazing… Did I base most of my post teen existence on them?… fuck you for asking… : ) Honestly who hasn’t?… a much better question… if you are into horror you already know them… and if you aren’t?… you are welcome…

Pantera… the drums… that’s it… all you need… Thunder from the fucking Gods… R.I.P. Vinnie Paul…
Childish Gambino

Okay… maybe I’m kind of cool… I’m hip… haha… Always liked him as an actor…. Mystery Team… all day… a rapper though?… then I heard this… first and only thought… he acts too?… god damn… That beat infected me for a straight year… just hit repeat again… relapsing hard…

Peter Gabriel

Losing all street cred on this one… but fuck a duck… shit in my heart… tear me down… I’d blast this shit louder than anything I’ve chosen so far… Say Anything all god damn day… this song pulls at my heart strings… love that guitar… that voice… fuck you if it doesn’t make you feel something… that’s how serious about how much this song effects me… So good… and I don’t know why…

That’s what I am doing… hope you enjoyed this special post… I had fun at least… listen to music… it will set you free…

This Week Was A Wash…

Yeah I had plans this week… well I did them… but not a damn thing for the website… next week for sure… in the mean time here are some songs that I am listening to… a half ass attempt to make it up to you… as soon as I pull my head out of my ass… I promise I have big ideas… problem is though… it is really wedged up there… bare with me…

This video is so creepy… but I love it…

Amazing song…
Can’t all be weird… love the bass line…

Right in the Soul… (Music Post)

If they don’t touch you that’s okay… these are just two songs that touch my soul… I recommend finding your own… because music is life… and we all have a beat that keeps us going in this world… find yours… dance… scream… do what you need… : )

Take care and have a great day…

Beacasue… I Don’t Want To Know… For Fun…

 

 

 

 

 

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All mixed up… but please… did you really expect anything else?... out of these which is your favorite?… no judgement… (Shh.. Dirt Room… please come on… you know me better by now…)

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Digging Up The Past… Time To Waste… Vol. 3

Back for another installment of embarrassment… still stuck on the age of seventeen… and moving into to eighteen… Chewing On Glass presents… Time To Waste…

 

The person you are
Nothing means everything you want to say
Nothing (x4)
You are
Nothing means anything I thought I needed to say
Nothing (x4)
I am 
Nothing is what we are
Nothing (x4)
My everything

This was yet another “song” I had in my head… Nine Inch Nails inspired… 

 

I am, everything
I am, everything you
Want me to be
I am
Everything you needed me to be
I am 
What you fucking’ think of me

 

What Do You See

You convey
Every little mother fucking thing
You show me
What it is you fucking think of me

You fucking do this to me
You fucking show me who I used to be
You fucking do this to me
You fucking everything I used to be

Why won’t you let me be
Every little mother fucking thing
Why won’t you let me go
What is it that you think of me

Chorus
(Everything, Everything) x2
I am everything you (Scream)
Need me to be
I am what you put inside of me

Okay so they aren’t complex songs… I have always liked punk for the same reason… It is… was… all about emotion… getting that thought or feeling out… this is how I feel deal with it… With that said… I’m still really into the chorus… I like the idea that the back up singer starts a chant… and then the singer answers back… obviously Nine Inch Nails and the Misfits… never really did that… If I had to guess that would be the Blink-182 influence I snuck in there… Which by this time… when I wrote this… I was too cool for such a band… Don’t be a sell out… blah… 

 

Movie Ideas
Zombie Film
Horror Movie
School / Drug Film (Would steal ideas from this for A Lie later in life…)
Cannery Row (Great fucking book…)
Messenger
Future/ War Movie (This would be folded into War of 2012… Never released… I believe…)
Superhero Movie (Naturally…)
Documentary (Because who makes the above movies… then is like nah… I’ll make a doc…)

In high school I was very much into music… it was my life… all I talked about… all I dreamed of… but in my head it didn’t seem obtainable… a dream… at the same time I was really doing well in Video Communications… won some “awards” for different things… they were in school awards… but people were pretty hyped… figured if I didn’t make it in music… I could do movies… overtime… that drifted away… mutated… and became writing…

In truth I’m too controlling to be a director… but not controlling enough to tell other people what to do… I like that about writing… It is all on me… the only explanation that I really need to get my point across is the story itself… I don’t have to explain what is going on in my head with another person… I don’t have to argue why this shot needs to be this way… oh I have an idea about this… etc… I write it and either you like it or… I try again… 

 

Here I sit I write for you
But you’ll never know the truth
Every day I’ll wait for you
But you’ll never see the truth
Here I sit I lie to you
But you’ll never know the truth
Everyday I’ll wait on you
But you’ll never tell the truth

 

Sun

It hurts to open my eyes
The worlds on fire
You have let it burn
My eyes are shut
It takes its course

You’re not born but when
You are you’ll want to die

Its been taken away
Before it was given
You have been left to die

 

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Always a blast… to revisit the past… not really… but sometimes we don’t know where we are going without knowing where we have been… life is a ride… well I’ll let the late great Bill Hicks explain… because honestly… I’ll just butcher it… 

 

 

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Digging Up The Past… On The Edge Of Seventeen… Vol 2

Editor’s Note: I’m pretty sure these were meant to be songs… That’s how all this began… going to try to copy them word for word… but I promise nothing… 

 

Wide Eyed

looking deep through your eyes
I see the truth in your lies
the many lives you’ve lived before
you’re nothing without the dead

wide eyed
try, I eyed
miss my life
buried in your
eyes

 

Editor’s Note: Most of everything is going to look a whole lot like Broken Thoughts… Because well shit never changes… just gets worse… dear God it is all leaking back in…

 

Sins of lust, sins of greed
Sins of wrath, sins of envy
What the fuck is gluttony???
Sins of life, sins of death
Seven Deadly sins, no rest
Sins of life, sins of death
Seven deadly sins, no test


(I remember what this is about kind of… I was really into the Misfits… Okay I still am… but at the time I was too… so I wanted so much to be like Glenn Danzig… Short horror punk songs… etc… this one was about the movie Seven… apparently I decided I was bored with the idea… because I never finished it… missing two sins…)

 

Communism, prevampire Catholicism
Find me lost in botulism
Finally realize
You must fuck the ism
Fuck, fuck the ism

 

Cross

What did you come up with?
What did you think?
Who fucking cares

“Communism is nothing but a red herring”

One of them is bigger than the other one
And one is not a pig
Society’s views are not viewed clear
Another generation has lost its integrity

Cross multiply, cross multiply
Cross
The Christian mask you put on
Is false

“Some say why does a preacher need a nice house?”
He is the god child
haha, you’re blind

Cross multiply, cross multiply
Cross
Raise me upon your cross
Realize that you are wrong

(This one is inspired by Nine Inch Nails… and White Zombie… The quotes are from soundbites I had found on the internet… I don’t know where the first one is from… the second one is from a movie… my friends and I used to quote all the time… even at seventeen the hypocrisy of religion was a theme I would obsess about… I have no hate or ill fillings towards any religion… I just can’t stand this idea that I’m better than you… so it is human’s for the most part that I can’t stand… why ruin something beautiful with your selfish needs?…

I don’t know… basically you won’t find me in church on Sunday… but you won’t be seeing me burn one down either… if you aren’t hurting anyone… do your thing… you have my support…)

 

What you need I don’t have
Why keep asking
Why Keep demanding
To see your god would be too hard
How far would you go
To see something that you don’t know

 

Walk of the dead
Walk of the dead
We walk
Walk of the dead
Walk of the dead
They plague

Look into the eyes of the living
Fear is creeping up on them

Walk of the dead
Walk of the dead
There is nothing left
Walk of the dead
Walk of the dead
They’re everywhere

(Misfits inspired once again… Wonder what the title of this one could have been…)

 

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Well that was fun… I have more from this time… I have no idea when the next post will come out… but there will be more… I hope that you enjoyed this version of Digging Up The Past… I’m off to be embarrassed in the corner… Until next time… keep fucking writing… 

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Broken Thoughts… Still Swimming In Need…

Candles burning black and then red
The world wanted more so I gave what they demanded
An army of flesh, an army of broken bones and regret
Can you defeat what is already dead?
The fires rage on, with no one to put them out
Will they ever die?
Candles burning black and then red
Calling out for the devil, in pain
The world was never meant to work this way
Killing all of those people who stand in the way
Making a stand never meant anything
If I had a dream, buried between blood and life

 

Writing is on par with shitting in the dark. Something is happening just don’t know if it is going where it needs to.

 

I don’t know what I did
But I’m sorry
People matter, people bleed
Give you whatever you need
I fucking concede
Scream, hit me, whatever it takes
I can’t stand this trapped feeling inside my head
I don’t know how it got, where it is
I don’t understand why you abandoned me

 

“Nothing is as perfect as we want it to be”…

 

Digging out my eyes
And wondering why
The past defines more than history
Where we’ve been, where we are going
How we die
Time tells more than what to run from
Chaos breeds order, order will drive you insane
A pattern of behavior
No one cared so no one asked why
We kill ourselves
So dragging the lake
Looking for anyone left inside

 

“Destroy yourself if you will. A god doesn’t know when to quit.”

 

My heroes once said
“Who the fuck are you to question why?”
God doesn’t care
“What makes you so god damn special?”
Let this shit burn
Destroy, never question why
Give in, the devil was all there ever was
You are only as good
As all the things you despise
Chasing a dream and wondering why?
Chasing a fucking grave
All the things that make me go insane
Between heaven and hell rests a place
I have to call home

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I realized while I was outside hating myself and the world that I hadn’t done a Broken Thoughts post in a minute… Maybe I will not be remembered for anything I do… maybe all of this will only be remembered by you… but as much as anything… Broken Thoughts… is something that I want to be me… to be mine in this world… I want you to have every one of your dreams… but this is mine… selfish?… maybe… hopefully not… we all need our place… If you write… keep doing it… if you read… keep doing it… if you do both… Thank you… 

Shattered dreams, Shattered thoughts
Who I’ve been all this time…

 

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Early one mornin’ while makin’ the rounds
I took a shot of cocaine and I shot my woman down
I went right home and I went to bed
I stuck that lovin’ .44 beneath my head

Got up next mornin’ and I grabbed that gun
Took a shot of cocaine and away I run
Made a good run but I ran too slow
They overtook me down in Juarez, Mexico
Late in the hot joints takin’ the pills
In walked the sheriff from Jericho Hill
He said Willy Lee your name is not Jack Brown
You’re the dirty heck that shot your woman down

Said yes, oh yes my name is Willy Lee
If you’ve got the warrant just a-read it to me
Shot her down because she made me sore
I thought I was her daddy but she had five more

When I was arrested I was dressed in black
They put me on a train and they took me back
Had no friend for to go my bail
They slapped my dried up carcass in that county jail

Early next mornin’ bout a half past nine
I spied the sheriff coming down the line
Ah, and he coughed as he cleared his throat
He said come on you dirty heck into that district court
Into the courtroom my trial began
Where I was handled by twelve honest men
Just before the jury started out
I saw the little judge commence to look about

In about five minutes in walked the man
Holding the verdict in his right hand
The verdict read murder in the first degree
I hollered Lawdy Lawdy, have a mercy on me
The judge he smiled as he picked up his pen
99 years in the Folsom pen
99 years underneath that ground
I can’t forget the day I shot that bad bitch down
Come on you’ve gotta listen unto me
Lay off that whiskey and let that cocaine be

The late great Johnny Cash… The bold lines are my favorite parts of the song…