Chewing On Glass…

This diagnosis escapes me
When I still feel the same
This prognosis is pretty negative
When I can’t stop hurting
Myself… Everyone… No one…
Seems rather lazy to give into such things
Rather pointless when you won’t let go
Seems rather useless given the reasons
This diagnosis escapes me
When I still feel the same
This prognosis is pretty negative
When the results are the same
About myself… Everyone… No one…

You could read it now… but it won’t make any sense…

There’s nowhere to go
Standing in the same place
Broken and bleeding… Getting smaller
Over time there should be nothing left
And here I sit waiting to not exist
There’s nowhere left to go
Staying in the same place you already know
Broken and bleeding… Still the same
Over time I should have learned something
About myself… the world I live in
But I don’t really know any more
Any more then when I began
There’s nowhere to go
Shitting in the same place
Day after day… Broken and bleeding
Over time you’d think I’d have learned
To stop pushing so hard…

Fucking burn it down already… or move on…

Desperately missing a feeling that isn’t there
The color and life drains from my body
Knowing I’ll never know what I missed
Walking away from what I believed
Don’t know if you even heard
The dead they don’t sleep they rest a little
But I know they are always coming after me
Desperately missing a feeling that isn’t there
The pigment and blood drains from my body
Knowing I’ll never know what I gave away
Running further away from what I believed
Don’t know if you even heard
These vampires they don’t sleep they take
And they take… until you’re like them inside
Desperately missing a feeling that isn’t there
Trying to remember what it was like before now
What it meant to live… What it meant to be free
And not strapped in this dying chair…

I never know quite what to say… Pretty major confession on my part… Feels gross patting myself on the back… But if I don’t do it ever once and while… Who will?… Feeling pretty empty inside at the moment… in neither a good or bad way… melancholy with a lack of anything to say… A dangerous combination for a writer with too much left to do…

Crippling almost… but I’m powering through… We all are… We all have to… for no better reason than we should… Motivation enough at times… Not so much in this moment… and I apologies… I’m a real bummer to be around right now… Until maybe I’m not… and the feeling comes crashing back down again… Hope all is well…