Breaking the Fourth Wall…

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I’m pretty laid back. I don’t express myself much through religion, cults, or anger. I get mad and I might even get offended though it takes a lot to get me there and I don’t remember the last time I was really offended. I told some body I was the other day because she burped near or around my face. I’m not sure that counts towards being offended or just thinking she was an asshole. Coworkers are assholes remember that. Usually though I am the one offending other people. Almost all the time I offend other people to the point that my friends have to signal me or use safe words to let me know that I need to calm it down. Is it because I am an asshole? Why am I even questioning that?

Maybe, but really it is because I’m not afraid to speak the truth. I’m not afraid to say that something is black when it is black and something is white when it is white. I know that there is gray out there. I get that. I’m not a fan of the gray. It leaves the possibility of too many what ifs. Getting off point, but I’m not sure because I never really have a point in all of this. I’m laid back. Most people tell me any and everything. Helps with character development so I don’t mind. Well, I do mind because I hate people, but sometimes out of the hate grows new people. For those of you who don’t know that is how babies are made. Unless you were made in a tube. Babies shouldn’t be made in a tube. A gray area topic, but then again, most babies shouldn’t have been here in the first place. Now we’ve found our way to the center of the dark gray cloud that hangs over my head.

I don’t know the whole topic is so touch and go. No one wants to see a baby die including this heartless bastard, but at the same time traffic is getting to be too much. Why do people have to go anywhere any more anyways for anything? Is there such as thing as too many people? Apparently, there is and apparently the best way to combat that is to make more because they just won’t stop falling out of vaginas. Have you been to a Babies’r’us, however the fuck you spell it, there are so many babies. Some of them are downright what the fuck drown that thing before it can eat you or worse vote conservative, but then there is always that one baby that is just so cute. Alright fine… they’re all fucking cute. Even the conservative ones. I am human after all.  I am more disgusted with myself than you will ever be.

Such a hard choice. To fuck or not to fuck? Being an adult sucks most of the time. Being a kid is so much easier. No one gives a fuck if you mess up. Okay maybe your parents but they aren’t even real people anymore. They are hollowed out shells of who they used to be thanks to you. Yeah, you killed your parents. Next time you see them, if you can, look into their eyes. Dead, they are dead. They still talk, breathe, and do shit but not really. They haven’t slept in so long that they don’t even understand the concept. Honestly what is the point? Give death a chance to take you in your sleep? That’s some adult mentality right there. “If I don’t sleep. I’m not dead.” That manic laughter you hear isn’t the boogey man hiding in your closet. It is your parent’s trying not to completely break down on the other side of the wall.  

Really though they haven’t slept since god knows when because of you. They’re backed up because of you. Their hopes and dreams are half of what they used to be. If they even exist at all because what’s the fucking point? I’m not bitter… Being an adult is the absolute worst. So, stop saying I can’t fucking wait until… because yes you fucking can wait.. Speaking of being an adult. I should probably go feed my kid. It has been six hours after all and her little arms can’t reach through the bars so well. Don’t judge me. How else am I supposed to get anything else done around here? The glass doesn’t pick itself up. That’s what my mouth is for.

Last time I write something personal on a dare… I’m so behind on so many things… Looking back… looking forward… everything will work itself out… there will never be enough time in a day… even if I spend most of it wasting away… kids aren’t so bad… being an adult is shit… but someone has to do… not really sure what it is that I am trying to say… I just know that I don’t want to do any of the things I have to do today…

Amazon… Paperback… Kindle…

The baby needs a bigger cage… accepting donations where ever books are sold…

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